What is this .... a Dodgy Necklace?

[Bob Bull]

Good morning Morgan People,
I am not one to say 'I told you so', but sometime ago I suggested that we needed a Silly Section on the forum, mainly for the whitless maunderings of people like myself. You need only glance at the list of topics 'On Track' to see that the item continues to attract readers, with well over 900 'hits', I rest my case!

The reason for this diatribe is the obvious attempt by our Moderator to steal my thunder and launch something called 'Loose Torque', a poor substitute for the real thing. 'I ask you, 'Loose Torque'? Sounds like a dodgy necklace to me.

Loose women? Talk to me baby!! Loose trousers? if only. Loose surface? Wave an oil flag!

One only needs to take a look, to notice the massive lack of response to the new section. An item on race overalls, and a rather dated advert from down under, nice try Tim, but my mate from New Zealand sent me that clip several years ago!!

I know what many of you are thinking, it's easy to criticise (and a lot of fun), so being a charitable sort I would urge that as many people as possible to log on and contribute some pearls of wisdom, constructive criticism, suggestions, advice, informed comment, common abuse or indeed, whitless maunderings to the site and save our Moderator's blushes. He is, after all, a fairly nice chap who does a marvelous job under trying circumstances with precious few thanks, and deserves our support.

Most of you will have tucked your precious charges away for the winter and will only spend your evenings watching soaps with the other half, (apart from Pete Sapp who is busy organising a stand) so there is no excuse, get your creative juices working, flex the fingers and get cracking on the keyboard. Your forum needs you!

When the hour cometh, one must step up to the plate, storm the breech, stand up and be counted, therefore I hereby pledge to play my part, and promise to make at least TWO major contributions to the Loose Torque section this week!!

Where I go (boldly) will others follow?

In order to stimulate interest and give an incentive to the faint hearted, I will send to the author of the subject that attracts the most responses, a magnificent CD of pictures taken during 2008 of Morgans. Wow!!!

OK? JK!

Bob.

[jack bellinger]

Bob I might as well reply .
It seems that nobody wants your CD .Probably cos there trying to imagine you in a Dodgy Necklace.

Being mechanicaly minded Loose torque is ..When you have a Cylinder down Or in your case A screw Loose!!.

My surname comes from when the Normans invaded We rung the Warning Bells .. Your obviously came from a long line of what you write!!,
Its Dave Sapp,,

love jack

[Bob Bull]

Well Jack,
It's a start.
(I have been corresponding with Dave Sapp, so I should have know better, sorry Dave!)

Oh! Thanks for that fascinating insight in to your ancestory, why not expand upon it and submit an entry into the Bob's CD Trophy Competition, there will be pictures of your son Billy Jim in the mix.

Not too sure about the 'love', but thanks anyway,

BB

[jack bellinger]

Expand on my ancestors been trying to do that since I was a teenager ..But only ended up with 3 boys and in ancestrial tradition their working on it too.

love jack

[Bob Bull]

Jack,
Perhaps we should not go any further into the subject of your 'expanding' affairs, we never know who may be listening.

Reciprocated affection.
Bob

[tim falce]

Good morning Morgan People,
I am not one to say 'I told you so', ........lots of crap inbetween..........................OK? JK!

Bob.

I have no idea what you are talking about, but then I don't drive a Morgan and I am on my 3rd glass of wine.

[JERRY KNIGHT]

Pete Sapp who is busy organising sand

is it for Tony's kitchen?

Tony is your caravan convertible?

does the dodgy necklace come free with the tennis racket?

[Bob Bull]

I rather think you are all missing the point here, while most of your comment and criticism may well be jusified (even if a trifle petty)*, the whole idea is to persuade YOU to launch your own ideas, bigotted, biased or otherwise on the forum, and provoke reaction from the congenitally idol and the systemic lay-a-bouts so prevelent on the roll of members!!

Personally I have always favoured the boastful, arrogant and insulting style of post, as this generally works better than a more 'girly' approach.

To Jerry; I fail to find the quote you attribute to me, or you also delsycix are?
Tim; I am sooooo pleased to note that you do not drink and drive. Well done on your moral compass.

* Petty a 500cc car from the 1950's named for it's designer Ray Petty, and currently owned by Dave Le Coq.

On a more positive note I am delighted that the allusion to Norse jewellery in the title did not require explaining, this speaks highly of the quality of our readership. Naturaly, with Jack's historical background he would certainly have twigged it right away.

Must do a bit of work now,

Cheers,

Bob the Bard.

[jack bellinger]

I vote Tim Falce gets your Cd .. FOR the most LITTERate reply

love jack

[Mary Lindsay]

this generally works better than a more 'girly' approach.

What, pray tell, is wrong with a girly approach?

Naturaly, with Jack's historical background he would certainly have twigged it right away

I have never seen Jack wearing a necklace.....

[Bob Bull]

Listen! I'm trying to get a bit of work done here!

Jack,
Do you not realise that Tim is a pretty Ace Snapper himself and were I to send him a CD of my, probably inferior, efforts he might be mortally offended.
So yeah! I might just do that, thanks for the idea. Let's face it he did post derogatory comment on my initial post.

Mary M' Darlin',
Nothing wrong with the 'girly' approach if you are writing to Womans Own, but if you really want to upset people, may I suggest you try 'catty' as an alternative, but shame on me for the very suggestion, I am quite convinced that Aunt Lindy would never stoop to such levels.
Do I take it from your remark re. Jack and necklaces, that he is not into Beckham Style bling ?

(Dear Moderator, I rather think that I am like the chap who was into Flagellation, Necrophilia and Beastiality, I appear to be flogging a dead horse.)

PS; If the Invisible Man should call, tell him I can't see him.

Bob.

[tim falce]

Bob, I still have no idea what you are talking about and if you carry on like this I may need to be on my 3rd glass of wine to even try and understand what's happening.

[Bob Bull]

Tim,
I am sorry that my efforts to inject a little light relief in to the humdrum lives of Morgan folk is beyond your understanding, however, I should not concern yourself that you may be thick or slow on the-uptake. You are undoubtedly of perfectly normal intelligence, probably even of above average intelligence, it is my warped and sadistic nature that is the real problem.
Like you I to do not drive a Morgan, but while you drown your sorrow in cheap wine, I as a tee totaller do not have recourse to the demon drink, thus I vent my spleen on perfectly decent types ie Jack the Ringer, Aunt Lindy, Jerry D-Type and anyone else foolish enough to respond to my 'whitless maunderings'.
Your lack of understanding does you credit, and your Uncle can be very proud of his nephew.

Why not post a fresh subject on 'Loose Torque' and demonstrate to the assembled company that you are, indeed, a truly splendid chap, although I would recommend that you sober up first.
By Jove, but that third glass of wine is lasting you quite a while.

Bob the Impaler.

PS; Does this make any sense atall?

[jack bellinger]

Bob,, can you just write 1 liners ..I keep falling to sleeeeppp

[tim falce]

Bob, it was all falling into place until you merged your last two words which has totally thrown me. I feel I have a couple of options here, one is to continue reading your illegible missives and possibly end up slitting my wrists or alternatively I could read some of Piston Heads.
Hmmm, where's my razor?